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Sunday 18 March 2018

A Fork in Every Traveler's Road

Traveling is like any other experience once you go deeper into it - it becomes incredibly nourishing and fulfilling in ways you could never imagine. You learn things about yourself you never knew were there, you have unforgettable experiences, you make amazing human connections. And sometimes the traveling experience becomes so addictive that you end up giving up your previous life entirely, to go traveling for years, maybe even decades.

And at some point you look back and wonder how you got to this place in your life, having experienced more than most people do in five lifetimes, yet feeling like you're on the outside looking in...
A lovely mix of working/volunteering travelers in Ollantaytambo, Peru 2017

Here in a nutshell (or not) is the emotional journey that leads the traveler to this eventual fork in the road. And I'll use some nerdy science to explain!

-~*~-

Beyond the most obvious and somewhat superficial reasons of going to cool places and checking off the bucket list, it can be hard to understand why one goes traveling in the first place. There certainly are more subtle, less obvious reasons why we travel.

From our tender youths, our brains are actually operating largely in the theta wavelength - this allows our brains to make and reproduce observations - in simple terms, in our youth, we learn to copy the behaviours of our family and our peers, to learn and conform to the culture of our society.

After age 7, our brains switch to a different wavelength, beta - signalling a new stage in life, one where we discover what it is we want for ourselves, how to carve out our own identity. And in this new stage, if we already fit in to the society around us, then there's no change needed or tension to address.

However, if we have a disconnect from the society around us we end up longing for escape. This societal disconnect could be with family, community or even country.
Stargazing in Uyuni Salt Flats, Bolivia 2017

When we travel, the whole experience is usually so new and stimulating that we tend to get wrapped up in the novelty of travel. Rarely do we see it as escaping from our native society as if it were a prison.

But it no doubt includes this reason - an opportunity to get away from everything we once knew, the society we grew up in, to start afresh with a clean slate, a chance to rewrite those cultural norms we learned until (and since) age 7.

So most of us go traveling for two general reasons - we are simultaneously being pulled to new experiences and pushed away from home.

But at some point the pull gets old. Like any other experience, if you travel long enough, eventually the novelty wears out. Believe it or not this can actually happen, you can start getting tired of traveling!

It happened to me anyway. At some point along my travels, I discovered that my passion for traveling had dwindled. And yet I was still doing it.

Eventually I realized the reasons as I have just been discussing - the novelty of traveling was fading away, and I was mainly escaping. In my younger days I did feel a disconnect from society, which fueled my escape. I also began long term traveling out of both discovery and escape, and now the latter was all there was left.
Playing... hopscotch? Annapurna Base Camp, Nepal 2014
This is the fork in the road - the moment when the novelty of travel fades away and no longer becomes a strong reason to continue traveling.

There are certainly long term travelers who make exception to the fork in the road - there are some whose lust for travel never dies, there are some whose disconnect from home is so strong they simply never want to go back. And there are some who never become aware of this fork in the road realization.

If you're reading this and feel stuck in your life, ask yourself this - do you feel stuck in your society, stuck in your job, stuck with your friends or family? Perhaps it is time to ride along your beta waves and go traveling to find your true identity.

Or if you are traveling without a purpose, are you simply continuing to escape from home? Then perhaps it is time to go home after all. And as difficult as it will be to confront the reasons you originally escaped, hopefully you have now developed the tools and adaptability through traveling to be able to overcome those reasons.
On my way to my hitchhiking spot towards Berlin - Warsaw, Poland 2015

Personally I did eventually return home. It has been a long process of overcoming, and I am still in the process of it. But luckily I have learned the tools and patience necessary to slowly reintegrate into Toronto society.

However, the travel bug has returned and I am longing - not for escape - but for adventure once again!

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